Let’s face it, it’s not every day you shop for an engagement ring, so choosing one that feels like the one is a decision you want to get right.
Whether you’re buying for a partner or searching for the ring of your dreams yourself, trawling Pinterest (opens in new window) for inspiration will only take you so far. Instead, you need the facts about what’s important and what’s not.
There’s a lot to consider, from ring size, setting, style and choice of metal to the all-important gem at its center (and there are plenty of reasons why it should be a natural diamond, FYI!). Most of us want something beautiful, yes, but also wearable, timeless and, importantly, within budget.
If your first question is, “what diamond size should I get?”, you’re not alone. It’s also a question that calls for some careful consideration, since it’s not necessarily straightforward.
Why carat is normally the starting point in engagement ring shopping
Of all the diamond details to consider, carat weight often takes center stage first.
What does carat mean in diamonds?
When we talk about carats, we’re referring to the weight of the diamond, not size. It tends to be one of the first things that comes to mind when people start thinking seriously about a diamond. You’ve probably heard benchmarks bounced around, like the idea that a one-carat diamond is the ‘standard’ size for engagement rings. And while that might be the right choice for some, it’s by no means a hard and fast rule.
Choosing the right diamond is about more than just carat weight – and even carat weight itself (and how it translates in real life) is more nuanced than most people realize.
What carat size really looks like in real life
Let’s visualize. Loosely speaking, a 0.5 carat round cut diamond is about the size of a peppercorn, a one-carat sits closer to a small pea and by three carats, you’re looking at something about the size of a cranberry.
Take these comparisons with a generous pinch of salt, though. The actual look of a diamond isn’t just about carat weight. It’s also heavily influenced by its shape and cut, among other factors.
Which diamond shapes look the biggest?
Typically, elongated shapes like oval or emerald cuts tend to look larger because of their stretched surface area. If you want something that really shows off its size from the top view, opt for shallow cuts that have more surface area rather than the deeper ones, which tuck their weight below the surface.
Choosing a setting that enhances the central diamond, like a halo or three-stone setting (also known as a ‘trilogy’), can additionally create the illusion of a larger gem and boost your ring’s overall brilliance.
You might also want to think about the metal band that frames it. A thinner, more delicate band, for example, can instantly make a diamond appear bigger and more prominent by contrast.
Diamond shapes that may appear smaller
Diamond shapes with more depth like cushion or princess can appear smaller from the top, as a lot of the diamond’s weight hides in its depth, where you often can’t easily see it once set in jewelry.
How do you find the best shape for you? If you can, visit a store in person to try different sizes, cuts and shapes and see which feels most ‘you’ (or your partner). Or use AR (augmented reality) tools online to compare how different gemstones sit on a ring finger virtually.
How your partner’s lifestyle and style can influence carat choice
When buying a natural diamond engagement ring, it’s obviously important to consider your partner’s individual taste. Do they prefer to keep it low-key or are they more maximalist? Do they enjoy layering jewelry together, or do they stick to just a few key pieces? Noticing the kinds of accessories they usually gravitate toward can offer some helpful hints about their style.
And while we’re all for prioritizing beauty, ideally, you want to balance that with a bit of practicality. Does your partner have an active lifestyle? Do they work in healthcare or another job that involves physical tasks? Are they often outdoors or maybe super hands-on with kids or pets? All these factors play into what diamond size will be comfortable and easy to wear.
Is a higher carat diamond better?
Impressive, Hollywood-style rocks can turn heads, but remember size isn’t everything. If you’re budget conscious, you can still be savvy when it comes to diamond shopping.
As larger diamonds are increasingly rare1, a diamond’s price doesn’t simply increase with its weight in a linear fashion. Instead, prices climb exponentially once you pass certain weights. Doubling the size of your diamond typically costs up to three or four times more, rather than double2.
After a certain threshold, prices naturally jump – but you can use that to your advantage. For example, a 0.95-carat diamond often costs significantly less than a one-carat gem despite looking almost identical to the naked eye.
How cut affects how big a diamond appears
Of all the 4Cs of diamonds, it’s cut (not to be confused with shape) that has the biggest impact on how the gem interacts with light and how brilliant it ultimately looks. Most people don’t realize it can directly affect how big a diamond appears at first glance. A smaller, well-cut diamond can look brighter (and therefore larger) than a bigger, poorly cut one, which will appear dull by comparison.
Choosing a carat that feels right for the moment
When it comes to saying ‘yes’ to the ring, it’s about choosing something that doesn’t just weigh or look right but feels right. You might decide to go for a slightly smaller carat weight in favor of better quality or to make room for something more meaningful, like a custom setting or a personal engraving, perhaps? Or maybe you want to go bigger because it simply fits the moment? Why not!
At the end of the day, it’s about finding something meaningful and beautiful that helps tell your love story as a couple – and when you boil it down to that simple equation, finding the perfect diamond engagement ring shouldn’t be so complicated after all.
